3: The Aftermath

   Today is a double aftermath- first workday after the Super Bowl and first workday after the memorial for my stepfather.  Obviously, the Super Bowl is of no importance to me other than it signals an opportunity for most students to cut loose and really bro out.  Viewing the aftermath I can pretty easily piece together two likely scenarios:

1. "Bro, dude, bro!  Packers won!  This is exciting for me and validates my need to supplement my lack of personality by associating myself with a group and/or situation that excels over another group/situation! Expletive!  Now I will engage in mindless acts of vandalism with the most difficult substance to clean from any surface: eggs!"
2. "Bro, dude, bro!  No!  Steelers lost!  This is distressing for me yet fortunately it validates my need for personal drama with the appearance of life-shattering disappointment despite any lack of hardship or deprivation in my 19 years of coddled existence!  Expletive!  Super expletive involving someone's maternal relationship!  I provide physical evidence of my duress by engaging in mindless acts of vandalism with the most difficult substance to clean from any surface: eggs"

   If I sound vitriolic it's only because since learning the word vitriolic I tend to feel that way a lot.  The eggs were splattered all over the floor, one was smashed into every nook and cranny of the telephone including the earphone and receiver.  Worst of all, they managed to smash an egg into the outgoing mail slot so that it would drain down onto all the outgoing mail, thus making this a federal offense.  Oh, crazy kids and their hilarious federal offenses!  Here are some pictures before I spent the entire morning cleaning it all up.

   All this aside, I can hardly find the words to talk about the memorial for my step father this last weekend.  So many kind souls showed up that it was almost overwhelming.  I put a video together that told his life story in as much detail as 15 minutes, 4 songs, and 100 some photos and video clips can tell.  I was very happy that everyone responded well to it despite the awkward nature of the family relationship issues and such.  But still no closure.  That term is a verbal unicorn, looks swell on paper, but in reality it's mythical and ridiculous.  The only closure any of us get is eternal sleep, because until then nearly every wound has the potential to be scraped anew by today's unexpected events.